Stress

Stress is like the worst thing ever. It messes up your body so much. I unfortunately inherited a panic disorder from my mother so i get panic attacks when i am stressed, and believe me they are not fun. It basically feels like your going to die, and it scares the crap out of you. Anyway i have had to up my medication because they got a little worse, but thankfully they are beginning to get under control again. They started up because of stupid finals. They are getting so close and everything is starting to be due for all different classes and basically everyone just feels like ripping their hair out. It's just blah. But thankfully thanksgiving break is almost here so that gives us a little time to relax, but as soon as we get back it is the final two weeks of classes for the semester. That is going to be so hectic and stressful i don't even want to think about it. Anywho, enough blogging, i must go finish the rest of my homework so i can go to sleep at a decent time as i have to get up at six in the morning to get to school by my eight o clock class.

Break

I am very excited that Thanksgiving break is almost here!! i am so stressed out right now because of everything i have to do in school and i just need a break. It will be so nice to just be able to relax and not have to worry about anything to do with school. I am very nervous about finals that are coming up though. My finals in high school basically only covered material from our midterm on, and this is going to be everything. I am embarassed to say that i have never taken a final like that before. But i am going to study hard and try my best. That is the only thing that i can ask of myself and also expect of myself. But for now i'm just hoping that the next week and a half goes by very fast so break can be here!!

UGHHH

SO today was just like a completely bad day. I was almost late for a meeting with my advisor because of traffic. I finally thought i was out of traffic and then guess what. This big huge truck that has something that looks like a huge ball labeled 65,000 lbs on it is in front of me. and it has flag cars in front and behind it and they are going like ten miles an hour. I was mad. So then i get to school and no parking spots. wonderful. I had to park all the way at the end of the main parking lot and then run to feldman with tons of books slowing me down. then english. that wasn't bad, we taught each other, and math, well thats just boring. So i'm starting to think okay maybe just a bad morning you know, all done. I was so wrong. Chemistry comes along and i get a 67 on my test. Luckily he curves the grades so he doesn't fail like half the class so it was actually a borderline C+ B-, but that's not the point. I want to do well without the curve, like get a good grade to begin with. Don't get me wrong i love the curve as it is helping me pass, but still. And i talked to my prof. and told him how i was struggling and it's not like i don't try. I study like mad, i read the text, i do the homework, but chemistry is just not my thing. He said he understood and to just keep trying. A lot of people are not good at it, i just have to pass and keep trying to do well. So i was sad. Then traffic all the way home and i am just very stressed. So i am going to finish homework and just go to bed. I shall blog at some point.

CHEMISTRY!!

I totally hate chemistry!!! We had a test today, and it seemed like everything that we learned was NOT on the test. I was so mad! I studied like crazy and the test just completely threw me. I probably failed. I try and try to understand chem but i can't. It's just like a foreign language to me that no matter how much i go over it and study i can't decipher. I just hope i don't completely fail the course.